Fruit, Flowers, Fourth Anniversary

Paper, check. Cotton, check. Leather, check! And yet again, we celebrate the birth of our marriage, four years ago today. The traditional gift for the fourth anniversary is fruit and flowers, which represent fertility, hope, growth, creativity, and renewal. What a perfect time in our marriage to be welcoming a new baby - and the FOURTH member of our family at that! With only three days left before we meet our second-born son, Sam and I decided this exciting time in our lives was gift enough. We did not exchange our typical gifts, since our fruit, our flower is on his way in just a few short days! However, we did enjoy our day and spent it well together.

This morning, Banner cuddled in bed with me after Sam went to work. Banner and I watched "Our Fourth Year" - the DVD I made for Sam documenting our year together. This is the third video Banner and I have watched together now before Sam gets to see it later that night. I like that this has become yet another tradition for our anniversary. It's fun for Banner to look back at his year, too - and he seems to remember so much of it! He would make comments about who was in the picture, where we were, or what we were doing. He made connections to other events that occurred at a certain time a picture was taken.

Later in the day, Sam came home early so we could phone conference with the rabbi about Baby's upcoming (private) bris and the Hebrew name we will give to him at that time. Fitting, I thought, to be talking about this baby on such an important date - with the same rabbi who officiated our wedding ceremony exactly four years ago.

Then, Mom came over to stay with Banner so Sam and I could go out on our last date night before Baby's arrival. We had a nice Hibachi dinner, went to grab ice cream, and then headed home fairly quickly once we got a call from Mom that Banner was really missing us. Once we got him to sleep, Mom left, and Sam and I settled in to watch our annual video. I absolutely LOVE making these videos for Sam, and I love recalling how we spent our year, how loved we are, how many amazing people we have in our lives, and how much Banner (and perhaps my belly this particular year!) has grown. We are truly blessed!

Another part of our anniversary tradition has grown to include showing our video to friends and family who wish to see it. I love sharing the video with them because it documents their past year as well, and I want them to see how important, special to, and loved by us they are! They lift us up, make us laugh, give us strength, and make our days even brighter.

Last year, Sam made a joke as we toasted to our three years of marriage. He said, "Here's to three more!" which made us laugh as if that was all we wanted out of being married. But, then we realized, really, if we always aim to make it as long as we've made it already, we're not asking for much, and we're always doubling the time we've spent together. So, even though it makes us laugh a little, I truly mean it when I say that the past four years have been amazing and "Here's to four more!"

Happy Anniversary, Sam! I love you!!

Our fruit and flowers! :)

Fourth DVD

DVD Menu

95% Baked

We made it to September! 38 weeks and 2 days pregnant today! Which makes today the middle of B-Day week!! Since Banner was a C-section, my doctor's policy is to do a repeat C-section for subsequent pregnancies. He schedules them at 39 weeks, so a week from today, I will officially not be pregnant anymore. I'm both saddened and excited about this. So much to look forward to, so much to miss. I'll miss my baby kicking inside me, I'll miss feeling him move and groove. I'll miss knowing that I'm the only one who knows anything about him at this time, and I'll miss having him all to myself. I felt this way with Banner, too - that I'll have to share him with the world, with his doctors, with his friends and his family starting in just a few days. And, as a friend recently reminded me, I'll miss not having to deal with a period!

But, I'm so excited to welcome this little one into his family who already loves him so much. I'm ready to hold him and kiss him. I'm ready to introduce Banner to his baby brother and watch the two of them interact. And, I'm more than ready to just make sure he's healthy and to make sure he arrives here safely.

I'm definitely anxious about a new normal coming our way. While I know we will adjust and things will fall into place, just like they (slowly) did after Banner's birth, I'm always a little frightened of the unknown and the uncontrollable. I'm not sure what life with 2 young boys will be like, and I'm never in love with change. I feel so comfortable with our "family of three" lifestyle, just like I was comfortable with my "no kids" lifestyle. It took a lot of time and patience to adjust to having Banner - and I think that's totally normal - so it's just a little scary to be changing our family dynamic yet again. But, like I said, I have no doubt we will adjust and find our new normal. And, I'm sure one day soon, I'll be unable to imagine a life without my second-born.

Today I had my last exam with my OB. Still no change, but definitely growing! My doctor made a guess that this baby will weigh around 7-7.5 pounds - pretty much what I've been guessing, too. But, there's no telling. It was once predicted that Banner would weigh over 8 pounds, but he was only 6 pounds, 13 ounces, so I don't give much credit to these estimates. My blood pressure has been normal this entire pregnancy, and my weight gain has been on track, which I'm thankful for.  We're set and ready for our C-section on Monday morning!

So, what else can I tell you?

Days to go: I have 12 days left until my actual due date, but my C-section has been scheduled for September 9th, so assuming Baby doesn't make an appearance before that, there are only 6 days left!

Size of baby: I haven't had a sonogram since 28 weeks, so I'm not sure what this particular kid is weighing or measuring now, but I'm told that babies at this point are about 19.5 inches long and about 6.8 - 7 pounds - about the size of a pumpkin.

Total Weight Gain: 29 pounds (my goal was 28 like with Banner... eh, close enough!) :)

Sleep: Still sleeping great, but turning over is a bitch. I need a forklift to transition from one side to the other with the weight of my belly. I am exhausted by Banner's nap time and try to nap when he does - but with the feeling of needing to get things done, that's a hard thing to really let myself do.

Symptoms: Braxton Hicks like no other! Friday night, they were coming pretty consistently around 6-7 minutes, but they weren't painful (just uncomfortable), so I just went with it and tried to sleep through it. Luckily, I did, and they were back to being more unpredictable throughout the next couple days. Reflux with a vengeance, but that should disappear as soon as Baby appears. Hip pain during the night for the past couple months, although I'm not sure if that's RA-related or pregnancy (probably pregnancy since RA symptoms have disappeared!). Oh, and leg cramps down the outside of my calf in the middle of the night - but usually goes away if I stand up.

What I'm most anxious about: RA returning, breastfeeding, Banner's reaction and possible regression, keeping Baby healthy when Banner brings home germs from school, massive sleep deprivation, and pain after C-section

Prep for Baby: Baby's room is ready to go! All clothes, burp clothes, bibs, blankets, sheets, Boppy covers, bumpers, etc are washed, folded, and put away. Bottles are unpacked and put away in cabinets, Banner is all set in his big boy room, and the infant toys are slowly making an appearance back in the house. Mom and I baked and cooked an assortment of freezer meals to have around after we get home from the hospital. A maid service is coming tomorrow, thank goodness! Bag is packed, Banner's gifts "from the baby" are wrapped, baby book is bought and ready for hand/footprints! The only big thing to do is put the Pack-n-Play together in our room, but I won't do that until Baby comes home. And, then of course, we'll need to put up the baby's name letters on his wall...

Baby's Name:  HA! As if I'd tell you! ;) But yes, he does have a name, and you'll just have to wait until B-Day to find out! Lucky for you, that's not very far away now!

There Once Was a Time. . .

Dear Banner,
As the birth of your baby brother approaches, I wanted to take a few minutes to tell you about your life as an only child. It saddens me that you won't remember these past two years of your life as our only baby. You won't remember Daddy and me trying to figure out how to adjust to a new life with children; you won't remember us bringing you home from the hospital - not a toy in sight; you won't remember those quiet nights of midnight feedings, the trips to the park with just us, or the ample play time you got with our full attention. I'm more than excited for you to meet your little brother - and for you to become a big brother - but I'm just a little nostalgic as we end this phase in your life when you were our one and only. So, to help both of us remember and savor these short days left as a family of three, let me tell you a little bit about it.

There once was a time . . .

-when you didn't have to share your toys.
-when you didn't have to share your parents.
-when you had date nights with Mommy & Daddy every night!
-when you got to choose what we ate, what we did, what we played with, where we went.
-when you cried, and I answered immediately.
-when you didn't have to see your things being taken away, handed down, or reused by someone else.
-when you didn't have to wait your turn or wait for a littler person to catch up.
-when no one made fun of you, copied you, intentionally upset you, or competed with you.
-when you didn't have to negotiate, compromise, or give in.
-when you didn't have to have someone borrow, ruin, or take your things.
-when Daddy would come home from work and you'd run to him without competing for his attention.
-when you could be as loud as you wanted, night and day, without being told you were going to wake your brother.

Those times are quickly coming to an end, my love. But, just think: your baby brother will never, ever know a time like this. He'll never know a time when you weren't a part of his life. He already knows your voice. He knows the sounds of your toys. He knows the warmth of your touch. He will always be surrounded by your toys, your things. And, honestly, this makes me happy for both of you. He's blessed to have you as a big brother, and you were blessed to have a time to yourself. Life is about to change for you - as I've been telling you for months in these blog posts. And even though I'm saddened that your life will not be as you are currently used to, not all of these changes are so awful.

There will soon be a time. . .

-when you'll never have to look far to find a playmate.
-when you will live with your very best friend.
-when you won't be able to wait any longer to get home to see your little brother and to tell him something awesome happened.
-when you will have someone to vent to about how annoying your parents are!
-when you will teach your brother all kinds of things - like how to tie his shoes, write in cursive, spell his name, or say that new cuss word you just learned at camp.
-when you will get into trouble together by laughing at all the wrong times.
-when someone will come to you for advice or words of wisdom.
-when you'll be able to read someone's mind by just looking at him because you know him so well.
-when someone will want to be exactly like you and will look up to you in a way no one else ever has or ever will!
-when you'll realize that having a sibling was THE best gift Daddy & I could ever give to you.

I know these things because I have two amazing siblings I grew up with. I was lucky to be in the middle - and have both a big brother and a little sister. So, I know what it's like to be the older one and to be the younger one. I can see it both ways. But, one thing I never got to experience was being an only child. I am envious of you for that, and I hope you will read this letter one day and know that, even though you don't remember it, there once WAS a time. An awesome time. A time Mommy and Daddy will never, ever forget.

One thing that will never change, though, is our love for you. You were first to make me "Mommy," and you have managed to bear with us as we navigate our way into and through this thing called parenthood. You're our guinea pig, Banner - and you always will be. We're always new at this with you, no matter what stage of life you are in. Being your mom will never be the kind of experienced job it will be with your little brother, so thank you, for allowing me to learn with you. Thank you for letting us love you now and always.

You may not remember these early days. But, there once was a time when I held you in my arms and no one else. I will always, always hold you (and this special time with you) in my heart.

I love you so much, Angel Baby!
Love,
Mommy

First First Day of School!

Dear Banner,
Today you had your very first day of school! You are in the 2's class with Ms. Betty and Ms. Jennifer, and you had a spectacular day. I want to tell you all about it so we'll both remember what a great start you had to your education - something that's always been a high priority for me and for Daddy and hopefully for you too!

While I've been so excited for you to begin your "formal" education, I have to say that I've been dreading this day for a while. It marks the beginning of a long road of learning, socializing, challenges, lunches, homework, backpacks, schedules, school supplies, evolving friendships, and meeting other parents and teachers. All exciting things - no doubt! - but just a new phase in our lives as parents and in your life as a student. Today also marks the very first time a non-family member was looking after you - a scary thing for any parent. You've always done well with your grandparents, aunts, and uncles, so I figured today would really be no different, but it was a milestone nonetheless.

Here's how it all went down...

Yesterday afternoon, we made applesauce muffins as a special treat for you to take for snack today. You loved these muffins! We also read a special story, The Kissing Hand, and we gave each other kisses in the palms of each others' hands at night time. I'm not sure you totally get the point of the story (you're a little young for it), but it was your idea to kiss my hand like Chester does in the story, and it made me feel better just having read it to you! Then, after you went to sleep, I got slightly emotional just talking to Daddy about you being "off in the big world" without us. I cried on his shoulder for a few minutes, and then it was time to get your bag and lunch ready for your big day!

This morning started perfectly. You and I both woke up at about the same time - around 7:00am. I got myself dressed and ready while you cuddled with Daddy watching YouTube videos about ice cream trucks (your newest obsession). You pretty much refused to eat your breakfast (pretty typical), and you were almost giddy getting ready for school (which made it kind of a challenge to calm you enough to get your teeth brushed, get your clothes on, and fix your hair). Then, we took a few pictures outside, and finally - we were off!

As we pulled out of the garage, you said, "Excited. School!" which made my day! We listened to the audio version of The Kissing Hand on the way to drop off Daddy's car at Grandma's house (so we wouldn't take up two (very limited) parking spaces at school), and we talked about how you would be staying with Ms. Betty while Mommy went to her doctor's appointment and Daddy went to work. You were perfectly okay with this. As we walked into the building and to the classroom, you seemed to feel right at home. You went right to the toys on the shelf and started pulling trucks and cars out. You could pretty much care less about Mommy & Daddy being in the room or not! I knew this would be an easy transition for you! You know Ms. Betty and are very comfortable asking her for what you need, you know the school well from Mommy & Me classes, and you know that Aunt Kira is just down the hallway! You also know that Mommy (and Daddy) always come(s) back!

As Daddy and I said our goodbyes to you, I gave you a Kissing Hand sticker for your hand, and then I kissed the palm of your hand - and you kissed mine. And then you and Daddy did the same. I would have cried at this point if I let myself, but I was already doing well holding it together and trying not to be overly sappy! :) Then, Daddy and I left the room after telling you we love you and giving one final kiss. Of course, we watched you through the classroom window with all the other parents and enjoyed watching you play.

The rest of my morning went really well. I had a doctor's appointment to check on Baby Brother, and the whole time I was trying my best not to worry about you or over-think my missing you! Soon, it was time to make my way back to school to pick you up. I went in to see how you were doing through the classroom window, and you were sitting so nicely eating your lunch. Ms. Betty came out to talk to the parents, and she told me that you had a good day but that you wouldn't let her change your wet diaper. Aunt Kira helped her with this, but you still weren't very cooperative for her, insisting that "Mommy change it!" We'll be working on this and hoping that you'll soon be more at ease with this process. Otherwise, you seemed to have had a great day!

When Ms. Betty brought you into the hallway, you lit up when you saw me! You pranced toward me as you said, "Mommy!!" with a huge grin that melted my heart - and will continue to as I think about that moment over and over again! Thank you for that, sweet boy! Your shirt and your arms were marker-stained - which told me you worked hard today and had fun - but I was still eager to get those stains out! :) And, as we left the building, you sat down in the middle of the walkway and said, "No, stay here!" I had to pick you up to get you to the car, but luckily you stayed in your great mood and told me about your day. You told me what you had in your lunch ("green grapes, strawberries, sandwich") and what you played with at school ("cars, trucks, digger book"). 

To celebrate your first day of school, Daddy and I took you to get an ice cream treat after dinner. You were so giddy and silly while we ate. You continued to wipe your chocolate-y hands all over Daddy's shoulder and say "Daddy's shirt dirty!" as we laughed at what a mess you were making. Such a fun evening!

Banner Boone, I'm so glad we survived this day! I'm proud of you more than you'll ever know, and I'm so happy that you had an excellent day. As you embark on this school journey, I'm thrilled to watch you grow more independent, to learn as much as you can, to make and keep friends, to try new things, to learn how to be a student, to respect educators and all they do to make you the best citizen and person you can be. I hope you will make good choices, be eager to learn what your teachers have prepared for you, and always be yourself. I hope you will be kind to your peers, accept everyone no matter how different from yourself, and be willing to make mistakes. And I hope you know that there really is no place like home, that Mommy & Daddy love you so much, and that we will always come back to you.

Happy First Day of School, Angel!
Love,
Mommy

With Ms. Betty

Already "at home" before we even left

With Myka

With Aunt Kira

Ice Cream Treat Time

Daddy's shoulder after you had your way with it

Camp Mommy Finale: Weeks 9-11

The last three weeks of "Camp Mommy" have come and gone! And, here's what we were up to in these final weeks:

Week 9: We hosted a small play date at our house, visited the indoor park again, participated in a Little Gym free introductory class, tried a Gymboree Music class, had a sleepover at Grandma's, went back to Jump Mania, attended a sibling class, enjoyed a dinner with Uncle Marc/Aunt Debbie/Daddy at Zaide's house, had a special lunch with Daddy for his birthday, and accepted Marin's Chuck E. Cheese invitation to join her for pizza and fun along with Logan, Aunt Mischelle, Brycen, Nami, Blair, Caden, and Mara. It was quite a busy week!

At Little Gym walking on the beam

Exhausting himself!

A little blurry but love this boy enjoying Gymboree Music

He said it was ice cream....

At his sibling class learning to diaper a baby

Hopefully he won't hold Baby Brother on his side like this

Getting his Big Brother certificate... LOVE!

Daddy with Banner & Brycen

Week 10: Aunt Kira spent the night and we played with her the next morning, we attended an introductory Gymboree Art class (and Grandma got to come with!), went to a play date-turned-shower, spent the day at Grandma's, and enjoyed a My Gym trial class and open house with Daddy. My Gym was by far our favorite gym experience, and we plan to sign up for classes come December!

At Gymboree Art - making "Frog Skin" with shaving cream and green paint

Banner's Frog

Building at Gymboree

My Gym

He loved swinging on the bars

... and the rings!

And he loved jumping in the ball pit over and over again

Week 11: We attended two birthday parties (Happy Birthday, Emma & Shayna!), said goodbye to the crib and hello to a big boy bed, spent an early (but hot!) morning at our favorite park, met Marin, Landry, Myka, and Andrew W. at the splash park, had lunch with Grandma, had our first play date with Brittney & Baby Blakely, went to the dentist for the first time (and did phenomenally well, and Daddy and I were SO pleased with how Banner handled himself), got a much-needed haircut, played at Ella's house, had a classroom visit at "Banner's school!," got photos taken at a maternity shoot, enjoyed a big play date at the mall with the other kids starting the 2's program this year, and went on a special "date" with Daddy at the indoor park one last time this summer! And then, to bridge the gap between Camp Mommy and the start of the school year, we made applesauce muffins (recipe found way back here) to enjoy with dinner. The house miraculously started smelling like FALL with the scent of all-spice and cinnamon filling the air. So yummy!

At the spray grounds with Landry, Marin, and Myka

Meet the Teacher at school - loving the barn toys

With Ms. Betty - teacher

With Ms. Sheryl - director

Mall Play Date with 2's classes

Applesauce Muffins!

Camp Mommy was a success if you ask me - and probably if you ask Banner as well! Our summer flew by, and we got plenty of quality time together. So much so, that I'm pretty sure in a few weeks I'll be mourning my alone time with Banner all over again. I admit I'm exhausted physically, especially as the summer gets hotter and my belly gets bigger. But, I am so proud of myself for pushing us to get out of the house, to find fun things to keep us entertained all summer, to enjoy our friends, to try new experiences, to be creative with our time while trying to avoid the heat, and to explore the many kid-friendly venues in our area. Banner learned a lot this summer, and I so enjoyed watching him grow from these experiences. While we will certainly try our best to keep doing these fun things throughout the school year, I know how hectic and crazy it's going to get - especially with a newborn. But, we'll try, and I've already started my list of fun stuff we can try next summer once Banner is three! :)