On June 6th, I had a routine appointment with my OB. I was 39 weeks and 4 days pregnant and had been seeing my doctor twice a week for several weeks after pregnancy-induced hypertension plagued my last few weeks of being pregnant. Some days my blood pressure was perfectly fine, and others it would spike to the highest end of normal. Even though it was in the "normal" range, it was high enough for my doctor to be concerned. He had continued to threaten hospitalizing me, but I continued to make deals with him - hoping to make it through the end of the school year and to several family events through the beginning of June. After weeks of "taking it easy," not only did I stay pregnant through the last day of the school year, but I got to attend our school's Awards Night, where I watched Caden and Mara receive awards and where I was surprised to be awarded Lifetime Membership by our school's PTA, I got to watch Mara graduate Kindergarten, and I got to attend my little sister's high school graduation. BBJ definitely cooperated by not coming early! Yet, by the 6th, my doctor was not as flexible with me. He wanted to induce that night, but I wanted Banner to have a few more quiet days inside my warm womb, so I made yet another deal. He said he'd hold off inducing as long as I could be monitored in the hospital. So, that afternoon, I went home to finish last minute packing, try to tidy up the house a little more, and come to terms with the fact that this would be the last time in my house without having met my son.
After Sam got home from work, we gathered up all my things and headed out for our last date night as a family of 2. After that, we headed to the hospital to be admitted. The plan was to just monitor me while on bed rest until my due date, June 9th. I would be induced that morning if BBJ didn't come before then. Cooperative as always (but at this point hoping he'd make his way on his own), Banner was staying inside, and the doctor was ready to have him out in the world. I just felt badly that I'd been hoping he could make it to his due date or later, and here we were wanting him to make an appearance earlier now. Baby was probably thinking, "Make up your mind, people!" Anyway, the hospital stay was fine up til that point - just very little sleeping since the nurses had to keep coming in to check my pressure, and who can sleep on a hospital bed anyway?
On the night of June 8th, I was moved to the Labor & Delivery wing. We had already been in two different rooms before this - one in antepartum and one in the high risk unit (although I didn't consider myself high risk). So, we were accustomed to moving at this point. Late that night, my doctor came in to insert a medicine to "ripen the cervix." Since this could have started contractions, Sam stayed the night with me that night. After my third sleepless night in the hospital, June 9th finally arrived, and still no baby. My blood pressure had been fine while in the hospital, but my doctor still thought it was too high to continue the pregnancy. So, we moved forward with inducing labor with Pitocin. Hard labor began a couple hours after, and going from nothing to hard labor that fast is NOT fun. After a few hours of more labor, the nurse and doctor were concerned that Baby's heart rate was dropping after contractions. They were worried that there was a problem with the placenta or the cord, so they gave a few more contractions to decide what to do. With no change, the doctor mentioned a C-section. Knowing I was opposed to this, he was willing to give a few more contractions to see if anything changed, but at this point, I responded, "Just do it," knowing Baby's health was at risk. The other challenge we were facing was that Banner was turned to the side, and he needed to turn forward or backward in order to avoid a C-section. Knowing both of these complications (facing wrong way and heart rate dropping), I knew a C-section was in the future anyway.
Within minutes, I was in the operating room. I was being prepped for surgery while Sam was putting on his scrubs. I'll avoid going in to detail about how emotional this was for me; I'll just say that I felt like I was on a chopping block as my doctor took the baby out of me when I wanted to deliver him into this world on my own. The surgery itself wasn't bad, just a lot of tugging and pressure. And, before we knew it, at 4:04pm, Banner Boone was being held up for us to see for the first time. He was a wrinkly, grayish looking creature with a weak cry at first. I remember squeezing Sam's hand as I waited to hear a more forceful cry, a cry we hear now very often!
As I forced my eyes to stay open and tried to ignore the deep pain running down my neck, I watched as the medical team cleaned Banner and got him to cry more fiercely. Soon, he was swaddled nice and tight for us to hold for the first time. It was very surreal, and it all happened so fast.
Moments later, Banner was leaving the operating room with Sam as the doctors finished operating on me. These agonizing moments dragged on and on, as I wanted to be with my son and my husband. I was also shaking vigorously at this point - a typical side-effect from surgery but one I didn't expect to be so painful to try to stop. I continued shaking for about an hour, but at least I was able to hold Banner back in the L&D room after surgery. When the doctor came to speak to us after a short time of peace and quiet with our baby, he explained that the baby's head was pressing up against the umbilical cord, and a C-section would have been inevitable as each contraction put Banner in distress.In about an hour, we were taken to our postpartum room where we invited our siblings and parents to meet the baby for the first time. I let Sam do the honors introducing Banner to his extended family as they got to hear his name for the first time.
We spent four nights in the hospital after surgery. On very little sleep, we got to start bonding with Banner and trying to analyze who he looks like. Here we are 3 weeks later, and we're still doing these things! The past three weeks have been one LONG day for me, really. I can't believe it's been three weeks, when it really just feels like the day keeps going on and on. My baby boy is learning so much, growing quickly, and getting to know his new home and his parents.
I had an amazing pregnancy. I loved being pregnant, even though there are things that were hard to tolerate at times. There were a few scary moments along the way, but overall, it was one of the most miraculous, special times in my life. Given that, I felt disappointed that it ended in a C-section that I really wanted to avoid. I was extremely exhausted, after three tiring nights in the hospital prior to an induction (which I've been told is much more stressful on the body) and labor that ultimately ended in surgery. At times, I felt like it was a nightmare of an ending. I have mourned the fact that labor/delivery didn't go as I wanted, expected, planned, or hoped. In addition, I'm still recovering, and my body feels beaten up from just being so darn exhausted all the time. I guess there's a big part of me that was wanting to see what my body could do on its own - without inducing labor when Baby and Body just weren't ready yet.
However, I had two big prayers going into B-day: to have a healthy baby and to have the ability to have more children in the future. Both of those prayers were answered on June 9th, and I couldn't be happier or more grateful for these miracles. For this, I am appreciative to my doctor for making the decisions he did, because in the end, I got the best gift of my life, and I can't wait to tell you all about him! (Coming soon!)
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