My Birthday Gift

I'm no photographer, but I've wanted a higher-quality camera for a while. I guess I didn't make that a secret, and for my birthday, Mom, Bob, Brock, Mischelle, Kira, Erick, Sam, and all the kids got me a new Canon camera! I'm still learning all the functions, and I have a LOT to learn on how to make this camera my friend and take great pics with ease. I'm excited to learn this and document my family, my friends, and our activities. As you know from Banner's birthday party post, I made a video for him of the important photos throughout his first year. And, each anniversary, I have made (and will continue to make) a DVD for Sam documenting our year together. So, pictures are important to me. I'm not going to go into business or anything (I'll leave that to my cousin, Logan, and those like her who are more business-minded than I am), but photos capture so many great moments and emotions. So, I want to say thank you to my family for purchasing this gift that will keep on giving. I hope I'm not always the one behind the camera, but if I get to look at images like this, then I'll take it! What a gift!

A Little Jell-O Fun

So, I decided it would be okay with me to make a big mess in the kitchen while Banner had some edible sensory play with Jell-O. He ate way more of it than I had hoped (and I'm hoping he doesn't have any kind of gelatin allergy!), but he got really into it. I made three different flavors - and he definitely liked cherry the best (my kinda boy!). I set it in a small container and tried really, REALLY hard not to direct his play at all. We had to be somewhere after this (what was I thinking!?!), so I didn't get crazy with allowing toys in the Jell-O, but maybe another time... We immediately went to rinse off in the tub before leaving the house, and I think the Jell-O may have made my boy a wee bit hyper about an hour later. Anyway, I'm just proud of myself for trying a little bit of this sensory play. It's really challenging to find activities for kids Banner's age when all he wants to do is eat everything he gets his hands on/in. If you have any great ideas given this problem, please comment below.

Here are some quick pics:

32

Well, it's official. I'm 32 years old. How did that happen? I mean, I swear I was just at the skating rink blowing out candles on my 8th birthday cake or having a swim party at Grandpa's house for my 11th birthday. I've always looked forward to my birthday - the parties, the gifts, the friends and family surrounding me and wishing me well. I have great memories of so many birthday parties. We used to have wading pool parties in the backyard, sleepovers with scavenger hunts, and for all those years I was at sleep away camp, my mom would send amazing care packages with a birthday banner that she would have everyone in my family sign before sending it to me. (And, she would sign it once for every year old I was and I would have to find her sweet messages x number of times.) So many years, my bunk mates would wrap my bunk bed in toilet paper and shaving cream, and Mom would send a cookie cake to the counselors for my friends and me to enjoy. For my 16th birthday, I took the trip of a lifetime - left for Israel the day I turned 16. Lots of birthdays celebrated at Kobe Steaks, bowling parties with the whole family, and summer night swim parties. 21st birthday was spent in Austin at Hula Hut and then a bar on 4th street. I had a surprise party when I turned 17 and again before my 30th birthday - and then I rang in my actual 30th birthday in the middle of our honeymoon cruise, specifically in Provence, France! And last year at 31, I had my newborn baby to help me celebrate a year that would bring lots of change!

Like I said, I have always looked forward to my birthday. I used to say it was my favorite day of the year, and when it would end, I would be kind of sad because I had to wait a whole year for it to be my special day again. But, as I've gotten older, the excitement has faded a bit. And, especially now that I have a son, I feel like his milestones, his birthday, even his month-birthdays, are more significant to me. As Sam and I talked in bed last night, I told him I was kind of sad about my birthday. Turning another year older meant less time with Banner. One day I won't be here, and each year passing is like a ticking clock reminding me that I can't go back, time only moves forward, and I'm moving away from my own childhood. Each year older I get, I am closer to the "end." That is a scary thought. I'm not having any kind of mid-life crisis or anything like that, but I certainly feel more saddened by getting older than happy about it. It's like I feel myself saying, "Wait! I'm not ready to be 32 or any other year older! I just want to stay like this!"

I asked Sam last night if he wanted to make out with a 31-year-old for the last time. :) Ha! Too much information? Sorry, but the silly question sparked a weird realization in my head that I want to embrace these relatively young years. Just like I've always said with Banner, today is the youngest I'll ever be, so I may as well enjoy it and live it up! When I look back at my childhood birthdays and all those amazing times, they feel like yesterday - and I know today will feel like yesterday even 20 years from now. I actually remember, for some weird reason, my mom's 36th birthday. I was not quite 8. We were at Grandma's house. I don't remember much more than that - but she was 36, and that feels like yesterday.

Ugh, I'm just feeling so nostalgic and existential at this birthday. We don't know how much time we have left here on Earth with our loved ones. It's crazy to think about all that. It's scary. And, it's so ironic that you spend so much of your childhood waiting for your birthday, waiting to be older - to be 16 and drive, to be 18 and see that movie or to vote, to be 21 and have that drink. Then, at some point, as you realize your time here is limited, you are like, "Someone put on the mother f***in' breaks!"

New Adventures

Sam's new law firm is officially open for business, and we're hoping for LOTS of it! He's been wanting to start his own practice for several years now, but there never seemed to be a perfect time. I've always been supportive of this idea (except when he was right out of law school and we were newly engaged). We've talked about it for a long time, and as scary as it is for Sam to give up a steady salary, I want him to be happy, to dream big, to do what he wants, and to go for it! We both decided there was never going to be a "perfect" time - and this specific time, especially, seems entirely too crazy to actually start now, but at least I still have a couple months of paychecks still coming while we tread water on no other income. I told Sam in May that if he's going to do this, he has to do it NOW while we had a small cushion of money still coming in. Starting late August, I'm officially off payroll, so we're hoping we can make this work pretty quickly!

He's starting up with two other attorneys from the firm they just left. They mostly practice business law, both litigation and transactions, employment law, health care law, and transportation law - generally just commercial litigation. He has several clients that came with him to start, and each day he's hoping to add to that book of business. (So am I!)

When Sam talked about this before, I was really nervous. While I was supportive and encouraging, I was also tentative and weary because of the jeopardy our family could be in if he didn't succeed. I'm not a gambler. I like definitive answers and plans. I like predictability and reliability. So, leaving a job that paid a set salary each month so that we knew our income for the year, well, it just makes me a wee bit uneasy. Yet, I have a strong sense of calm about me. I have a faith in this business that I have never felt before, and I believe strongly that these three attorneys will make a great team and do great things for their clients. Out of blind faith, I feel a peaceful confidence that we will be okay, Sam will be happier, and we just might make a bit of money! So, please join me in congratulating my husband and his partners on starting up this business. Sam, I am so proud of you for chasing this dream and making it happen. I'm wishing you all the best as you embark on this new adventure. Thank you for taking me along with you. I know the road won't always be easy, but I'm right here next to you cheering you on and lifting you up. (But, if we are on welfare by the end of the year, I'll be asking you to stop "flying your own kite" and get a new job!) :)

**For more information about Sam's firm, please "Comment" below and I will forward his website to you!

Mother Clutter

I am so sick of the clutter in my house! I know I'm not alone in this feeling, so I'm gonna put it all out there! Keeping my house uncluttered was never my forte, just ask my previous roommates, right Robyn? Kira? Kira would probably tell you I'm the worst at putting things away. I have a bad habit of not unpacking after a trip, of leaving my water glasses all over the house (mostly at my bathroom sink), of leaving clean, folded laundry out wherever I folded it, and sticking anything I don't know what to do with on my kitchen table. It's awful! And, having a baby did nothing to make me more of a de-clutterer! Until now!!! I'm telling you, I am on a rampage to get this house in order. Now that it's my "place of work" as well as my home, I am determined to have a neat, tidy, organized house that I will want to keep that way.

I've always believed that your physical space is representative of your psychological and mental state - and vice versa. Looking at my house makes me stressed out. I'm stressed out, and then I can't even get started on taking control. I even did a staff "training" on this at school - telling teachers that the cleaner their classrooms were, the less stressed they would be. And, this is so true. So, I'm trying to clean the clutter in my house, and maybe the clutter in my brain will settle down, too.

When it comes to Banner's things, I feel pretty good about my system - his room and "things" are the only organized things in the house. I was like that at work, too. My entire classroom and student areas would be neatly organized, bright, colorful, presentable, and tidy - but throughout the day my desk would be a complete disaster. I firmly believed that it was important for my students not to pay the consequences of my clutter, so I never impacted them in that way, and every afternoon (and for sure on Fridays) I wouldn't leave until my desk was mostly clear so I could role model for them some kind of organizational skills... and I think that's why Banner's areas are so organized. I always put his laundry away. I always put his toys away. I go through his clothing pretty regularly to pull out what he has outgrown and pack it away or give it to my baby nephew. His diapers, wipes, books, towels, etc. are always stored neatly. So, I feel good about his areas. I do feel, however, that he is overwhelmed by how many toys he has now (even when I have hidden some of his birthday toys for later), and I need a system to help him really play with them. Just when I am ready to pack up his infant toys, he shows interest in them, so I'm not going to do that just yet, which makes for a crazy, colorful assortment in our living room. These toys then get strewn about the kitchen, dining room, bedrooms, etc.

So, I find myself "pinning" away on pinterest, looking for great ideas to help me organize, because I think most of my problem is that I haven't figured out a good system for where things go. I have found some great sites, and I'm starting to implement these great ideas. Sam may not think it's the best time for me to start going through our whole house - but with all the big changes in our lives right now (me resigning and him starting his own law firm), I feel the need to take control of SOMETHING! My house is my "victim" - a willing one in this case - because I can hear it screaming to me, "HELP ME, SAVE ME!" And, the thing is, I really value my house and the things and people in it, so I really want to be more in control of how those things and people are treated by de-cluttering!

So, I've divided up my house into 5 big projects:

• Project TOYS! I found this idea for rotating toy bins to make for easier, more fun play. I already went to Target and purchased 4 inexpensive clear bins, and while I was taking most of Banner's toys to equally distribute them into the bins, he was finding things to play with as if he'd never seen them before! I am in love with this idea, because a) we won't lose toys or keep searching for missing pieces/balls/shapes all the time and b) Banner will look forward to playing this different toys every four days. (I did keep my colorful toy organizer out which has some staple items he can play with daily, as well as the bigger, bulkier toys.) While I haven't put them away yet, here is a picture of the four tubs I'm using with a great assortment of toys for the boy. Each bin has at least one puzzle, one stuffed animal, one musical toy, one "talking" toy, and a few books. Then, the rest is an assortment of fun things Banner enjoys. We're on day three of the bin rotation, and so far, so good! I love this plan, and it's really working for us. The best part for Banner is "new" toys each day. The best part for me is that it's easy to clean up before bedtime, and my living room is clean, AND there are no lost toys or missing items!

This is the only "project" I have completed. The next few tasks will require future posts to see how I'm doing. I hope that by blogging about these projects, I will actually DO them! It will hold me a bit more accountable.

• Project LAUNDRY: There are way too many things piled up on my dryer. There are way too many unused things in the cabinets in this room. There are way too many things on the kitchen table that should stay right near the garage door - and the laundry room can house these things. So, I'm going to add a new cubby system, as well as a few hooks so that my purse, the diaper bag, shoes, and other knick-knacks can have a place. Sam and I will also be going through the cabinets to make better use of them.

• Project ARTS/CRAFTS: I have SO much crap stuff that I had in my classroom/office that I paid for myself years ago as a fifth grade teacher. I didn't want to just leave it or ditch it, so I brought it home in the hopes that I can utilize it with Banner. Things like sidewalk chalk, blank books, stamps, craft sticks, stickers, clothes pins, dice, buttons, magnets, colorful note cards, paints, etc. Don't know what I was thinking buying all that so long ago - I guess I thought I'd have time to do fun projects with my students (What the hell was I thinking? You live and learn!). Anyway, so I have so many doo-dads and things to sort through in boxes from my office/classroom, that I have to get a handle on it all. I don't want it to just sit there; I want to USE it, so I must be able to see what I have. I also have a ton of gift wrap that I need to organize. I have some inspiring ideas to help me: here, here, and here.

• Project KITCHEN: This is where I'm going to call in reinforcement: Mom and Kira. Soon after July 4th, Kira and Mom are coming over and helping me reorganize my kitchen. It's been a work in progress since Banner was born. His needs are changing - fewer to no bottles, more bowls, plates, sippy cups, silverware, and less baby food! So it's time for an update by making his things more accessible. My pantry actually looks great, thanks to some ideas I found here. But, I still have some clearing out to do. And, the fridge, oven, microwave, and dishwasher all could use a good scrubbing. I already started cleaning the fridge - but Banner was doing his best exploring and getting in my way a bit too much. If only nap time lasted a bit longer!

• Project BED & BATH: Really, the only thing needed in these areas is some major de-cluttering and donating! This is last on my list because I can handle this one a bit easier and probably during a nap time, too.

More to come on each project as I take charge of all this mother clutter!

12 Month Check-Up

Oh, Banner Boone! You have gone and grown up on me a whole lot today! First I want to tell you about your 1-year well visit today with Dr. B. You did great! It was fun watching you walk around the waiting room for the first time. You were friendly to the others waiting - walking up to them and smiling - and you kept Daddy on his toes as he chased you around when you tried to make your way to the back or out the front door when patients came in to the office. Luckily, just when he was about to lose his patience with you, the nurse called your name.

You did great as the nurse listening to your heart and checked your height, head measurement, and weight. But then, we had a long wait before Dr. B came to see you. You were all over that exam room trying to open cabinets, playing with the rolling chair, grabbing all the books from under the table, and wanting to touch everything you saw! Yes, it was a whole new world for you to explore, and you certainly kept us busy! Finally, when Dr. B walked in, he brought a medical student with him to meet you. You were friendly and cooperative for them. You didn't like your ears and throat being examined, but otherwise, you were great - and curious about what Dr. B was doing to you. You even made a funny "ehh?" sound as he unfastened your diaper to take a look at your goods. Almost like you were saying, "What the hell?" :)

So, here's what we learned about you today:

• You are 30.75 inches tall, which is the 75th percentile (You grew 3 inches since your 9-month check-up!)
• You weigh 23 pounds and 8.5 ounces, which is the 65th percentile. (You gained almost two pounds since your 9-month check-up.)
• Your head is 47.1 cm, which is the 70th percentile. (Surprisingly, this is down from the 75th percentile at your 9-month check-up.)
• The biggest change was your height! You shot up these past three months (when comparing you to your 9 month check up which may have been an inaccurate reading because at that time they told us you were in the 35th percentile - and we all doubted that was correct)
• Developmentally, you fall somewhere between a 12.5 month-old and a 15 month-old - based on our responses to the questions asked. When Dr. B told us this, the medical student asked when you started walking, and when I told him 10 and a half months, Dr. B said, "Yeah, he's always been pretty advanced." (Daddy and I loved to hear this - even though we are SO okay with wherever you happen to fall in these bell curves. We know you will learn at your own pace and are just fine with that. But, we are very proud of all your accomplishments and don't want to downplay that pride!)
• You are a healthy boy! We were excited to report to Dr. B that you did great with weaning you off of your reflux medication. 
• You got three shots: Hep A, Prevnar, and Varivax for chicken pox. Daddy and I decided to skip the MMR vaccine for now because we are just not comfortable with it at this young age. You'll get it eventually, but not yet. This round of shots was by far the hardest for you (and me). You are more and more aware of what is going on, and you cried an awful, deep scream of a cry immediately after the first two shots were administered at the same time (one in each leg). I kept waiting for you to take a breath, and I think Daddy even said, "Breathe, breathe!" to you as I held your hands and whispered in your ear that I loved you and that you were okay. You took longer to calm down when it was all over, but Daddy was right that once we left that exam room, the change of scenery really helped you. You laid your head on my shoulder as we checked out - so tired and exhausted from such a long visit and from being so late to start your second nap!  

We were told to stop the formula and replace it with whole milk, to stop bottles and only offer sippy cups, to introduce you to any foods we want other than nuts/nut products and uncooked honey, and to start brushing your teeth with a toothbrush instead of a washcloth like we were instructed to do your first year of life. So, big changes for you - and mostly for me since I'm so accustomed to following a specific plan/schedule for you each day. New routines are a good thing, but Mommy is not the best with change, so give me a couple days, and I'll be fine. YOU on the other hand, are so "go-with-the-flow" that you don't seem to mind a few of these changes! Here's how our night went:

• After your nap, we gave you a bottle of half formula and half whole milk. You seemed to like it! I was worried you would reject it, but so far, so good! (Aside: part of me was a big nostalgic as we finished our last bit of formula which has been the core of your nourishment your first year of life! Yes, I know, Mommy is extremely cheesy and emotional, but I feel like that formula and I have been through a lot together. It started off as my worst enemy as I felt like I was offering you poison when breastfeeding wasn't working out, then it was a cause of confusion when we weren't sure which one to offer you as a refluxy baby, and finally, it was our mainstay - a central part of our day (and once upon a time, our nights) that so many of my thoughts and anxieties revolved around!)
• Since Daddy didn't go back to the office after your appointment, we all ate a nice dinner together. You ate a great meal of cheese quesadilla, broccoli, and diced apples. You were cracking Daddy and me up with your "Soooo Big!" arm movements and saying "Wow!!" over and over.
• We played for a while before starting your bedtime routine. You had a great bath, and once ready for bed, you took what I hope will be your last bottle. (If I need to give you a few more every now and then tomorrow and the coming days, that's fine with me!) Yet another "goodbye" to your infancy - watching you and Daddy snuggled up in the glider with your bottle and those precious times of just holding you as you ate. 
• After your bottle, instead of trying to wipe your teeth with a washcloth, we took you to the bathroom for your first official "toothbrushing" session! :) You were not a fan of the fluoride-free toothpaste, but you liked the toothbrush with just water, and it was fun to hear those bristles scrubbing your little teeth. Yes, it's the little things that get a mom excited!! :) 
• Then, to bed you went after our Goodnight Sh'ma book Daddy and I have started reading to you each night. 

I am so proud of you my Angel Baby. I am so glad to know you are healthy, growing, developing, and learning! I love watching you each day, and I'm so proud to be your mommy! Here's hoping you and I both take to these changes well in the coming days/weeks. Thank you for being patient with me as we go through all of these learning curves together. And, thank you, for letting me be mushy and sentimental! Some days I forget that you are going to grow up and that our days of bottles, formula, and rigid schedules are going to be a distant memory all too fast. So, I'm mourning it now as it happens, and I promise to hold all of these memories for you! I love you!

Father's Day Weekend 2012: Picture Mania

LONG POST BELOW! :) What can I say? It's been a busy, fulfilling, awesome weekend!

Our Father's Day weekend started with some exciting news. Sam put in his two weeks notice at his law firm because. . . he is starting his own practice with two other partners! I am so happy for him that he's finally doing something he's wanted to do for a long time! This is a very big endeavor that I know will pay off (hopefully soon because we have NO INCOME if it doesn't work out! Dear God, please be good to us!). We joined my sister-in-law in celebrating her fiance's birthday at Chili's that evening, and then Sam and I hung out the rest of the night talking more about his new law practice. (More on this to come!)

Father's Day officially started yesterday (Saturday) when Sam and I made a water park out of our back yard for Banner. We had a really nice time goofing off with him in the sprinklers and baby canopy pool (which I didn't get pictures of because I was actually IN the pool after we got it set up). Then, later in the evening, Mom & Bob snuck into our backyard with a new gas grill for Sam from them, my siblings and their families, and me. I am super excited to have this, as is Sam, because even though we love the charcoal grill - the gas grill is way faster! We even used it last night for Banner's first cook-out here at home. 

Love!

Then, this morning, Sam slept in while I got up with Banner around 7:15. (He's been sleeping in a little in the mornings these days, and I am SO.THANKFUL!) Baby Boy was quite a helper by playing quietly near  me in the kitchen while I prepared a fun breakfast for Sam. We made him homemade donuts, scrambled eggs, turkey bacon, and coffee that we delivered to him in bed shortly before Banner's nap. The donuts were super-easy to make. They were tasty, but I still prefer glazed donuts over these cinnamon sugar ones. Maybe I'll try that next time! :) I got the recipe from Pinterest, but here are some pictures I took as I cooked.

Making homemade donuts

Making a "breakfast for the champion" - not the breakfast OF champions!

Being a big helper while eating Cheerios

We made donuts!

Here is the display we made before entering the bedroom.

Donut, turkey bacon, and egg "Dad!"

Luckily, Sam had just woken up as we came in the room. Perfect timing! Here are some photos from Breakfast in Bed with Banner:

Then, it was time for cards and another gift:

Can you see how much Banner wrote to Daddy? He must take after his Mommy!

Opening his gift from Banner

The note inside

Portfolio for Banner's artwork to Daddy

And, inside, Daddy found Banner's first art project

Here's a close up - thanks to Aunt Kiki for helping

Playing with the bag on Daddy's head

Now Banner's turn

When Banner got up from his nap, we met my dad and his family for a Father's Day lunch with Brock and his family and Kira & Erick. It was a great pizza meal, and Banner even ate a few bites of pizza after he threw a piece or two on the floor. (He's becoming much pickier these days, so I welcomed the pizza exploration!)

Happy Father's Day, Daddy!

Aunt Kira & Brycen

Love this pic of my dad and me, but need to photoshop that spot in the middle of us!

Uncle Brock and Banner

Ansyn with her niece Mara!

Aunt Kira and Banner Boone

Mara wanted a kiss from "The Ban-Man" too!

Aunt Kiki with Banner

Banner and cousin Mara

Big Boss & Lisa with Banner

Caden with his Uncle Tyce

Big Boss and his grandkids

Our gift to Dad

Brock opening his gift from Mischelle and kids

Photos from Hawaii

Then, we headed home in the sudden rain for a second nap before going to my Mom's house for yet another Father's Day celebration. (We have three dads between Sam and me, so we are busy on days like today!)

A tad blurry but had to get a pic with Papa!

Playing at Grandma & Papa's house

Grandma & Banner

Banner was intrigued by Aunt Mischelle soundly sleeping

So he had to wake her up!

After only 45 minutes visiting Papa on Father's Day, it was time to head over to Zaide's house! When we got there, Banner wore his gift to Zaide - a pirate hat for his new fishing boat! :) Banner handed it over to Zaide as soon as he saw him...

Here Banner is handing Zaide the pirate hat

And Zaide gladly put it on! Looks great!

Playing with cousin Miles

Uncle Sammy & Miles working a puzzle

Zaide & Banner

Zaide showed Banner a picture of himself when he was a boy - with Mamaw and Papaw

NaNa pushing Banner on the toy plane

Colby loves his daddy

Aunt Gayle playing with Banner

Colby wanted to ride like Banner did

Reading a Clifford book with Daddy

Happy Father's Day, Jason!

Colby being silly in Uncle Paul's hat

Whew, what a fast, busy day it's been! Sam and I feel like ping-pong balls going all over the place, but we wouldn't want to miss out on all the fun with the great dads in our lives. I know I wouldn't want it any other way, and to be spending all this time with the greatest daddy was awesome! I love celebrating my husband and all that he gives and does for Banner (and me!). I hope Sam knows how much Banner loves him and appreciates him even if he can't verbalize it yet. As "Banner wrote" in the card he gave to Sam, I hope he knows "by the light in my eyes, the smile on my face, the reach of my arms, the squeeze of my hands, or the resting of my head on your shoulder." Happy Father's Day, Sam, and to all you great dads out there!