Dear Banner,
Happy 6th Birthday, Angel Baby! Oh, what do I want to say to you this year!?! It zoomed, it challenged me, it awed me. What a whirlwind of a big year for you - for all of us! Kindergarten, losing teeth, riding a bike, whistling, moving houses, starting a new school, meeting Hayla and Damon, wanting to be on swim team, reading like a 2nd grader! These are the big things that happened for you this year, but there's so much more!
I told myself when you turned six I wouldn't do these little updates any longer - that maybe they would start to embarrass you or that they'd be too hard to keep up with. But, I feel a yearning to write all this out. I want to capture you at this age and be able to share it with you one day. As always, the years fly by, and you won't be six for long! The days are long, but the years so short, and I just can't help but want to reflect and reminisce about the year you were 5.
Academically, you are at the top of the class. You are excelling and reaching far beyond what is expected. At the beginning of the school year, you were reading at the beginning of first grade level, but now you are well into 2nd grade level. At the beginning of the school year, you hated to color, but now, you know how to take your time and enjoy making something beautiful. You don't hate it as much, but it's still not your favorite. Your math skills are also impressive! Although you don't call it multiplying, you do it well in your head and understand how to add numbers multiple times. For instance, at Sea World last week, you told me, "Mommy, we rode the roller coaster three times - but it was really six, because each time we went twice around the loop." Or, you will tell me how many seconds something is if I said we have 3 more minutes and you'll count to 60 three times. You are also in the gifted program at school, and you adore your GT teacher and the activities you get to do with her. I've taken a few classes to learn more about GT kiddos, and now that I have my own, I fully understand why it can be quite challenging. I'll explain below later...
Socially, you are Mr. Popular. You know every kiddo in Kindergarten and whose class he/she is in. The kids all seem to know you, too. You love to stick your head out the window and wave to all your friends as we leave the carpool line. "Oh, Mommy, there's Jood! Roll down the window!" or going through drop off in the morning, "Oh, hurry, Mommy, I see Kate R; I'm gonna walk in with her!" And, maybe you'll see Andrew walking in, too, and the three of you will hold hands walking in together. You LOVE play dates and want to go to friends' houses any chance you can. You so enjoy Knox - with an occasional frustration at him when he unknowingly turns off your Xbox game by pushing the lit-up power button on the console. You and Quinn have a love/hate relationship. Best friends who make each other laugh, but you two can be so mean to each other a second later. I try to stay out of it, but man, you can be one mean little booger to him. You forget he's only 3 and adores you with every ounce of his being. He copies you and wants what you have and what you want. It's the ultimate form of flattery, but you don't see it that way. He chose the same stuffed animal from the Sea World gift shop and he wanted to name his dolphin the same thing you did... and you said that was so mean. But, he just wants to BE you! One day you'll get that and love him for it, but right now, not so much!
Physically, you are long and lanky but still on the shorter side compared to your peers. That could be because you're one of the younger ones in the class, but we'll find out your percentiles next week at Dr. B's office. We plan to talk to him about a few things that have been bothering you and us a little: the continued bedwetting, continued transient motor tics (opening your eyes wide), and perhaps some inattentive behaviors that we feel may be ADHD. Those are my only worries with you, but they are aren't small. As I was writing about before, you also have some GT overexcitabilities that come into play and cause emotional outbursts and frustrations for you. You have an imaginational overexcitability and a sensual one... you hear everything, you imagine everything and then it makes you become a scared little kiddo. You don't like to go places by yourself (upstairs or to your room or even playing Xbox by yourself). You like someone to stay in your room with you until you are asleep - often asking us to hold your hand. You end up in our bed pretty much every night, but we are working on this! The inattention, forgetfulness, and impulsivity pieces are what get you into trouble a lot, and you have even started noticing this yourself. It breaks my heart when you have said some of the following: "Mommy, there's something wrong with my brain," "God made me wrong; there's something wrong with me. You have to ask me to do things over and over again, but you only have to ask Quinn once," "No one likes me," and through tears, "I'm trying my best, but I can't do what you ask me to." Because you are so bright and don't get into much trouble at school, it's hard to know what's really going on with the ADHD concerns, but my goal for the summer is to try to figure this out with you. We are open and honest with you about our desires to get you help, as you have expressed your own concerns that you need it. It's just so hard to separate ADHD from giftedness and from strong-will and from first-born and so on!
Lately, we are utilizing a nickel system to help encourage you to both listen to our directions and encourage you to make good choices. We also have noticed that this system is helping you monitor your screen time and is reinforcing your skills with money. Every Monday, you get 36 nickels in your baggie from the "bank" baggie. You have the ability to earn more nickels if you go above and beyond our expectations. You lose nickels to the bank for poor choices. You owe Quinn nickels if you hurt him in any way. For every nickel you have, you have 5 minutes of screen time. You can cash in however many minutes you want at a time, during allowable times. The nickel system seems to be working pretty well. You have quite an addiction to the iPad, so this helps you realize how much time you're spending on it and helps us monitor it.
You love... donuts, candy, chocolate (quite the sweet tooth!), Lego Dimensions on Xbox, Slurpees, history, iPad, playing on the computer, Legos (and Tinker Toys and K'nex, too) buying your lunch at school, riding your bike, going to the park, Pokemon cards, doing "experiments" with random items around the kitchen and building concoctions and art work with recyclable stuff, color baths, the color green, desserts, swimming, learning the words to new songs - this year it was: Replay, Cake by the Ocean, Hello, One Call Away, Shake It Off, Man in the Mirror (
Lego Batman version), and Friends are Family.
You hate... homework, getting up early when you're not ready to wake up, staying in your seat at meal times, bugs, being alone, surprises, when someone takes the remote from you, being told screen time is over
Last night when I tucked you in, I asked if you were going to miss being 5. You said yes, you would. I asked what you would miss about it, and you answered, "Kindergarten." We talked about how first grade was going to be great, too, though. I asked if you thought six would feel different than five, and you said yes. When I asked why, you said, "I'll be nicer when I'm 6. I'm going to get rid of my 'baditude' and have more 'gratitude.'" I LOVED this answer. You were remembering a book (
Baditude) that I've read to you a few times. This morning, you certainly seemed to already be modeling that idea. You woke up in our bed - to Quinn and I showering you with balloons as Daddy and Knox came in. You were smiley and let me cuddle you after we sang "Happy Birthday." Then, we went out for donuts and let you blow out a candle when we came home. Then, we went to a new play place with Ella, Brycen, Nami, and Hayla - and Levi joined later. I reluctantly ordered you the Sprite you were begging for, a new favorite since getting one at Camp Gan Izzy over winter break nearly 6 months ago. Then, Aunt Mischelle took you to her house for a play date with Brycen and Nami, another favorite treat. At the end of the day, we had some fun at Chuck E. Cheese's - yet another favorite - where we celebrated with more of your favorites: lots of cousins, grandparents, friends. Before you went to bed, I read you your 5-year-old "I Believe" that I wrote for you. As you've gotten older, it's fun reminiscing with you as you remember more and more of the year, and so many times your reaction is "Oh, yeah! I remember that!!" I think it helps us put the last year to rest and to remember all the funny, the happy, the challenges of "5."
Banner Boone, it's hard to believe it's already been 6 years since we met. In other ways, I feel like I've known you MY whole life. We are still learning this parent/child thing together, and I often feel so sad that I don't have my shit together better for you. I'm getting there, and you've been more than patient with me. I wish I could say the same about me - that I've been patient with you. You challenge and test me daily with your inattention and difficulty following directions. You are on a path of your own so much of the time - wanting to do what you want to do when you want to do it, the way you want to do it. Dr. B usually reminds me that you are doing exactly what you're supposed to do - trying to pave your own way on your terms to become independent. I'm trying to remember that! My favorite time of day with you is at night when you just want to chat, ask questions, open up to me about anything. I love this time with you, and I love how cuddly and sweet you are. While you are getting to be so big and mature, you also still need me to kiss away boo-boos and hold you when you are sad, and we still "argue" over who loves who more. No matter what, I will ALWAYS love you more than you could ever love me - so there!
Happy 6th Birthday, Angel Baby!!!
I love you so very much! More than you could ever possibly imagine!!
Love,
Mommy
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| Bright light! |
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| At Jungle Joe's |
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| At Chuck E. Cheese's |
