Cruise 2012: Back to the Future

Last Sunday morning, Sam and I put the last piece of luggage in the car, washed the last dish in the sink, locked up the house, and drove Banner over to my mom's house. We were both nervous and excited about our first big trip away from Banner, and it was time to say our goodbyes. I showed my mom his favorite YouTube videos, I passed over the health insurance card, I reviewed our pediatrician's information with Grandma, and then reluctantly let her and Banner walk us out to the car. Yes, I cried. Yes, I said all my goodnights for the week and said a special prayer in Banner's ear. And, yes, it was very hard to drive away - especially after Banner said, "Lufyou" right as we were about to roll up the window and slowly pull away. It was the first time Sam and I (together) would be away from Banner for more than a day. I knew that once we got on that ship, all communication would be limited, and the ability to just pick up and get home if we needed to would be completely impossible. So, this was a rough moment for a mom and dad. But, we did it. And, I had a little something up my sleeve that helped distract both of us as we turned the street corner and waved our last goodbyes.

Even though it was a couple minutes out of the way, I asked Sam if he would go to the park around the corner. It was the park where we had our first kiss. He was puzzled, but tentatively said, "Yeah." He said I was making him nervous. "Why? Why are we going there?"he asked. I said, "We can either go there or back in front of Mom's house where everything else has happened." (Like where we were the first time Sam said he loved me, where we were when he proposed, where Kira and Erick got engaged, and where I told Sam 2 years ago that I was pregnant.) So, I knew this comment would make him really curious. And, understandably so, he said, "Are you pregnant already!?!?" I smiled, knowing he would probably think that. "No, I'm not. Just go to the park, and you'll see," I replied with a giddy grin.

After Sam parked the car, I kissed him and then had him close his eyes. I pulled out a Shutterfly photo book (seen below), and I reminded him (although he already knew) that 14 years ago on that exact day (November 25) was our first date. November 25 is a special day for us, so this was a fitting gift, in my opinion.

I called the book "Back to the Future" because, well... read for yourself. This is written on the first page:

16 years ago, almost exactly at this time, we met at Kaplan induction. Two years later, on November 25, 1998, you and I would cross the bridge from being best friends to becoming much more. Not a day goes by that I don't thank God for you and for our love. We have had quite an adventure over the past 16 years, and this photo book documents those years. Each day of this cruise, which embarks on our 14th "dating" anniversary, we will celebrate two years at a time, starting from those early days of getting to know each other until today. So, without further delay, let's go back to 1996 and work our way ... back to the future!

He was really surprised, and we talked about how deceptive I may have been while creating this gift: working on it right in front of him after Banner had gone to sleep almost every night in early October, asking Shelby and Cherie and Kira and Mom for help finding pictures that I couldn't find, having the book delivered to Mom's house so he would never suspect a thing, and how I used my ice time at physical therapy months ago to brainstorm each year interval. He was allowed to read only the first "section" - 1996-1998. From that day on, he could only read the next two years. Also, each section has a page for additional memories and a page for "Our Greatest Hits" where we could write in the titles of songs that were "ours" or that remind us of that time in our lives. We would work on this together each morning of the cruise.

From the park, we grabbed some donuts - you know, to start our healthy cruise diet off right! :) Then, I started the iPod playlist I had made the week before. And... you guessed it... it was a playlist entitled "Samber's Greatest Hits." I kept it on shuffle so even I didn't know what song was next. This was a GREAT way to spend our 5 hour drive to the port. I've never been on a faster road trip. We were inundated with memories, melodic trips to the past, and great conversation about what that song reminded us of.

Before we knew it, we were parking our car and heading to the LONG line to check-in. (This was THE most unorganized, most chaotic check-in process I've ever experienced. After 3 other cruises, this one came in first for worst, longest, most ridiculous check-in process.) When we finally came aboard, the smell of the ship had us both smiling and looking at each other; we were finally here. It was a familiar smell, and it relaxed me immediately - just knowing what fun awaited us.

We went to our stateroom to relax a bit, and we sat on our balcony as the ship pulled away from the pier. It was then, as land got farther and farther from me, that I felt my heart squeeze so tightly - knowing that we would soon be surrounded by nothing but water - and NO way to get to my son in an emergency. I could feel that imaginary umbilical cord tugging, and it was awful! But, again, we distracted ourselves with NOTHINGNESS! It was nice to have the ability all week long to sleep when we wanted, eat without cutting someone else's food, not clean a dish, not wipe someone else's ass, not cook a meal, not worry about the laundry, not have any errands to run, not worry about if anything and everything that is dangerous to Banner was out of reach, not think about changing a diaper or how much milk he's drunk that day or whether he's had enough vegetables or too much television time.... The list goes on and on about how my Mommy-brain could just shut off for a week - minus the constant desire to see Banner and the prayer that he was okay.

In all honesty, I still feel like everyday since Banner was born has been one LONG day. One day bleeding into the next ever since we left the hospital. But, this trip was like a hiatus from that day, a rejuvenation and a time to recharge. It was amazing. Let me tell you more about it:

Day 2: We were at sea all day. We started the day off with a room service breakfast, and we read the next section of the "Back to the Future" book. Later, was one of the highlights of the trip: laying out on deck 12 with a cool breeze blowing in the hot sun while we listened to a very "Caribbean" band play. I remember just looking at Sam, holding his hand, as I grinned a pretty big grin. One thing I noticed which was so nice was not being bothered by mosquitoes or ants. I could have my food or drink and not worry about some bug in it! Weird observation, I know, but worth noting.

Our first formal night

Day 3: We were in Cozumel. We had an excursion in the late morning: "Semi-Sub Experience" where we got to go into the hull of a small boat and observe the coral reef through windows below deck. It was very cool, but about halfway through, I got pretty sea sick. I get car sick, not sea sick - but this was a first. It was just a weird experience. Cool, but weird.

Day 4: We were tendered in Grand Cayman. Sam went by himself on a "Snuba" excursion; I got a 75-minute full body massage. Amazing! While my RA symptoms were in full force during the cruise, and they were not any better after the massage, it was still very relaxing to at least have a 75 minute distraction from the pain. So nice.

Day 5: We were in Falmouth, Jamaica. We got off the ship in the late morning with our friends we made at dinner the first night. These friends sat with us at our table, and they mostly only spoke Spanish. The entire week, we would have great dinner conversation with these new friends of ours, Rocio and Jorge, who are from Mexico. So, we decided to spend the day with them while shopping around the port.

That's the ship in the background!

Our friends, Rocio and Jorge

Day 6: Another "at sea" day. Lots of lounging! (And LOTS of water pics!) This was the first of two nights when we (Sam & me, Rocio & Jorge) would be the last couples to leave the dining room after dinner.

Gotta love a good nap!

Our last formal night

Day 7: Another "at sea" day. More napping, lounging.... My favorite part of this day was playing mini-golf on the Sports Deck around midnight. We explored the ship and tried our best to memorize the views of the ocean at night.

Farewell show

In between all of these activities, we spent our time napping, watching movies, reading, playing Chess (a new fave for Sam), writing in our "Back to the Future" book, and watching our anniversary videos and Banner's birthday video. We also just loved hanging out on the balcony - especially at night and first thing in the morning. In fact, we ordered room service 4 of the 7 mornings. Although it's a more limited menu, we loved waking up to breakfast in our room and enjoying the view of the ocean first thing in the morning. Oh, how I miss the water.

On the last night, I asked Sam for a few moments to myself out on the balcony. I feel so calm and peaceful there. It's my "happy place," my place of comfort, and where I feel extremely spiritual and whole. I love the water. I love a good reminder about how tiny we really are - how little our problems really are. Being fully surrounded by the water, with no land in sight... well, it's truly amazing and humbling. On every cruise I've been on, I try to memorize this feeling and the images before me. I take those with me and remember them in times of stress because it calms me so much.

The following day, we endured the maze and chaos of leaving the ship. Once again, the port was disorganized, and the process was lengthy. When we finally were able to pass through customs, we headed to the car and then to Houston to meet Robyn and her girls for lunch. This was my first time to meet my best friend's youngest daughter, Corey, who is just beautiful - like her big sister.  We had fun with them and took a few pictures before heading back on the road to finally get home to Banner. It was at this point that we listened to the rest of "Samber's Greatest Hits" play list. This made the trip so fast, but not as fast as the week before. I think we were so anxious to just get home to B!

We arrived back at my mom's house about 20 minutes before she and Banner returned home from a birthday party. When we heard the garage door go up, we waited for them to come in - deciding to let him come to us rather than us rushing to him. We knelt down as he entered the house, and I sweetly said, "Hiiii!" to him. He lit up, ran to me, hugged me, and then as I stood up, he reached one arm around Sam. We had a big family hug, and Banner kept leaning in to both of us for kisses. It brought tears to my eyes to see him so excited to see us, and it was so good to see him again and to have him in my arms.

I hated that our trip was over. But, coming home to my sweet boy definitely helped! Sam and I decided a couple years ago that every even year we would cruise. I'm already looking forward to knowing what we decide for 2014! In the meantime, I'm just so happy that we were able to travel, that we still enjoy traveling together, and that we had such a great time celebrating our history and coming back to "the future" - to our little boy - who was safe and happy!