Levi Emmett

A year ago today, my littlest nephew was born. I never wrote about his birth or his entrance into the world, but I remember wanting to every day. At the time, I just wanted to be in the moment with my sister, to spend time with her at the hospital, and to do what I could to keep my kids out of my mom's way so Grandma could help the new parents and bond with her new grandson. I remember being overwhelmed at that time because Quinn, at 5 months old, was still very much a handful and so was my 2 and a half year old Banner. I was a substitute teacher who used my time at my former place of employment to get away and "have a day off!" When those days were gone, I guess I collapsed a little - or at last keeping up with my blog did!

But, the joy of a new baby in the family was amazing! I was ecstatic to have another nephew, that Quinn would have another cousin so close in age, that my sister would get to experience motherhood with me - yet another thing we could share together. So, I want to write about my sweet nephew on this day, his birthday - better a year late than never!

I remember his birthday - well, my point-of-view - clearly.  It was about 5:30am. My boys were still asleep. When I saw my cell phone light up with Mom's name on it, I knew it was "go" time. Mom's voice was excited, and I could tell she was in a hurry to get to the hospital. She told me what had happened so far - the sudden labor Kira went into, the water breaking, walking the hallway at her house, not knowing if she should call someone or not, packing her things while having major labor pains, the way Mom could hear Kira in the background of Erick's phone call. Mom told me she'd let me know what to do next; she knew Kira wanted me to be on standby to come up to the hospital during labor. I hung up and Sam knew exactly what was happening. Neither of us slept from that moment on. We were excited, anxious, nervous, and prayerful for Kira and Erick. We chit-chatted in the few minutes before the boys woke up about parenthood and how life for my sister and her husband was about to change. We reminisced about our boys' births. And, then, the boys woke up and I tried to focus on them. Then, suddenly, my phone rang again. Kira said, "Hello, Aunt Amber!"

I was totally taken by surprised, to be honest. It had only been maybe a little over an hour since Mom called - and I wasn't supposed to know that Kira was even in labor or at the hospital (or tell that Mom had already called me), so I didn't know what to say!! "Hi, Aunt Kira," I replied, not thinking to say "Mommy!" to the new mother. "I'm holding your nephew!" she said proudly.

"What?!? Wait, what?! It's a boy? You had him? What?!" I was thoroughly confused.

"It's a boy!" Kira said. And, she proceeded to tell me a very brief version of her very brief, unmedicated, water birth. But, she wouldn't tell me a name until I got to the hospital. So, I got off the phone with her very quickly, tried to get myself and the boys ready as fast as I could... to wait. We weren't supposed to go to the hospital just yet. So, we waited, and waited.... and then finally, we headed to the hospital.

I arrived with my toddler, my infant, lots of snacks, toys, and diapers all in my big buggie of a double stroller. As I maneuvered through the hospital door, I saw my mom, my dad, my brother-in-law, a little bundle of a nugget nephew, and my little sister sitting up looking gorgeous as ever as if no pain had touched her. I can't remember exactly how she introduced us, but it was in those next few moments that I first laid eyes on Levi Emmett. He was so little, so yummy, so beautiful.

And, a year later, he still is. Levi's smile lights up the room. He's sweet and smart and sensitive. When I think back throughout the year, a few things pop into my mind. I have a favorite memory of playing with my boys when Levi was a newborn. We were playing at Mom's house, and all 4 of us (Banner, Quinn, Levi, and me) had our heads on the little play mat. I remember wanting to bottle that moment up before these little boys are big and running all over the place (and that's already happening now!) or before they are grown teenagers who never give me the time of day anymore. I remember going over to Kira's house when Erick and Mom were both out of town. Levi was about 6-7 weeks old. I remember Levi's little legs barely touching the onesie he wore because it swallowed his little body. I remember Kira feeling overwhelmed at new motherhood as I teared up listening to her - knowing full well what she was experiencing, but also knowing how months from that moment she would miss her itty-bitty baby and how very much I missed my Quinn being so little and fragile. I remember aching for the days when my boys were so little and just wanting to soak up my nephew at this little but mighty stage. I've also been able to watch Levi hit big milestones - not necessarily for the first time - but I can still remember him rolling over for the first few times, as we cheered him on "Go! Go! Go, Levi!" or watching him take his first few steps or try a new food.

I've enjoyed watching Levi become Quinn's best friend. Those two play so well next to each other, sharing space and toys and giggles. Rolling balls to each other, reaching around each other, discovering new things along side each other. Quinn will hear Levi waking up from a nap and want to go into his room at Grandma's to get him up. He's learned to gently (and sometimes not-so-gently) pat Levi on the head... and Quinn has learned that Levi can dish it out, too. They color, chase, picnic, make messes together. I know the coming months will introduce new challenges to these boys as they want new things and have different ideas of what is fun or what is "theirs," but they seem to truly love and really like each other, and I hope that is always the case!

I am grateful for Levi and the joy he's brought my sister. I love that he made her a mommy, a role I knew she always wanted and would be good at. She's not just good, though. She's amazing, and I am so very proud of her. I know this year has been challenging and trying. What first year isn't? Her initiation into motherhood was like most moms - tiring, exhausting, grueling, worrisome, heart wrenching, yet all beautiful and joyful and magical. I know she's looking back at this first year with nostalgia, a yearning to go back to those first few minutes with her baby boy who she can still see so clearly in her mind. I know she wishes she could do a few things differently - maybe embrace the time more or take it all in better or stop the worrying. We spoke this evening about this and the irony of it all: she wishes she could redo Levi's birth and slow it down a bit . . . I wish I could redo Banner's birth and change my perspective of things at that time when nothing went my way. We both had very different birth stories, yet we both want to change something about it or the way we perceived it. But, our stories are beautiful the way they are - because both of us have these gorgeous, healthy babies. And, just like motherhood, you're always going to want to do it again - do it better, do it right, do it over again because it was amazing.

So, on this first BIRTHday, I wish my sister peace and happiness as she looks back at a year filled with love, learning, milestones, growth, change, and complete success! I wish Levi many, many, many more birthdays. And as he enters this second year of life, I wish him love, happiness, and health always! Happy Birthday, Levi Emmett!

Levi - Day 1

Our first picture together

Levi - Day 360

Our most recent pic together

17-Month Newsletter: Quinn

Dear Quinn,
This month flew by! There's not entirely too much to report in this newsletter; we've had a pretty boring month! :) But, each day you continue to brighten our lives with your sweet personality. You are so loving and cuddly, so eager to learn and listen, so full of sweetness.

So, here's what I can tell you about this month:

• You just cut another tooth (grand total is a whooping 7 teeth... we're making some progress considering you didn't get your first one until 12.5 months!). This new one is the bottom left tooth next to the middle teeth. Your middle teeth are so tiny - mostly appearing tinier than they are because they are crooked and turned nearly sideways! Oh, braces, here we come! But, you are so cooperative with toothbrushing and are eager to have your teeth cleaned (or at least suck on the itty bitty bit of toothpaste we put on the brush!).
• We officially started Toddler & Me classes at school (we went a few times in December, but now we are "enrolled"). Once a week, you and I get to join Banner at Torah service on Thursdays, and then we say goodbye to him to join Ms. Mara's class. You are making great progress there. You have definitely started feeling more comfortable - smiling and listening to Ms. Mara, Ms. Donna, Ms. Rhonda, and Ms. Lisa. I enjoy watching you develop more of a sense of independence as you explore the library, the playground, the gym, and some friends in our class. You are always interested in what Ms. Donna is showing the class on the felt board during library (and you also enjoy taking whatever she puts up there right down!), and you love to play with the balls and roll down the mats in the gym. You like strumming Ms. Lisa's guitar, and you LOVE sitting with Banner at Torah. . . you both actually get along and hold hands during a lot of the assembly. Your first little friends in that class are: Benjamin, Grayson, Blaire, Luca, and Hudson. You typically share your space well with them and can even parallel play nicely.

You at Torah wearing Banner's kipah (which you simply call "hat")

• To your word list, you've added "apple," "ish" (fish), "bearis" (strawberries, a new favorite food!), turkey, Bot (for Rescue Bots that Banner loves), "gapes" (grapes), and my favorite... "Nice!" usually after you give a kiss or hug.
• You can tell me what a horse says ("neigh, neigh!"), what a dog says ("wooh, wooh!"), and what a cat says ("moww, moww!"), but you haven't quite locked in cow and sheep - you need me to remind you of those. 
• Your favorite song is "Twinkle, Twinkle," and you love doing the hand motions to it. You also like "Head, Shoulders, Knees, and Toes" and try your best to keep up with the movements - but you mostly jump right to bouncing up and down from knees to toes. Most music interests you; you don't like to be in the car unless music is on, and you shift your attention from whatever you're doing to the music or songs or dancing that might come on TV (recently, I can use the dancing/singing songs from Ella Enchanted to calm you down when you're getting antsy before dinner).
• You still love to read at night before bedtime. Your favorite book is probably My Name is Not Quinn, a special book made for and given to you by Blakely. We have also started checking out library books at the public library, and we both like the variety of books that adds to our repertoire.
• You got your MMR shot. Mommy was holding off on this shot like we did with Banner. He didn't get his MMR shot until his 18-month well check, mostly because this is the one shot that just makes me a bit more nervous than the others (for lots of reasons). I have every intention of getting my kids vaccinated, but I tweaked the schedule to make myself a bit more comfortable. . . . UNTIL there was a measles outbreak linked to Disneyland, and then measles cases were being reported too close to home. I heard the story break on the news one night (and I never watch the news!). First thing the following morning, I called Dr. B's office to get you in for your MMR shot. I'm glad I did, even though a week later you spiked a fever and seemed otherwise uncomfortable. But, better that than measles, right!?
• We talked to Dr. B about your "allergic shiners," the bluish/purple bags under your eyes. We will be watching those more closely to figure out what is going on with that. You've had those most of you life, and I wish they would go away, because when they are not there, your eyes light up so brightly!
• You are becoming quite the comedian. I think I wrote about this last month, but your silly faces and comedic timing are so funny! Just the other night, you had all of us cracking up with you as you made your silly faces or copied what we asked you to say or do.
• We celebrated Brycen's 3rd birthday at his house, and you had lots of fun with your cousins! We also just went to Levi's first birthday party! He won't officially be 1 until later this week, but we had a blast celebrating him. He's definitely one of your best buds, and I love watching the two of you interact and play together! 
• You and Banner are getting along better these days. He's getting more patient with you, and you are understanding what he wants and how to play with him more and more, so you two are starting to have more fun together. You definitely adore him and want to be where he is, and you love when he loves on you!

You and Banner enjoying "afternoon snack" (as Banner calls it)

Quinn, one of the most frustrating things about you is your disastrous sleeping habits. You rarely sleep through the night for more than a few nights in a row. Your naps are unpredictable. We rock you to sleep, and while I know we need to stop that, it's so much easier than the incessant crying that takes place if we don't. So, forgive me when I say that I often dread napping you. But, at the same time, I love the way you feel in my arms. The other day, you fell asleep pretty quickly, but the way you were so snuggly and cuddled in my arms, I didn't want to move. I just wanted to savor the sweetness of your smell and the warmth of your body and the softness of your little arms draped all over me. And, no matter how your night went, you always wake up and want to rest your head on my (or Daddy's) shoulder. You love for us to hold you tight and rub your back or stroke your arm or caress your hand. This is perhaps one of the most special things about you - your loving, tender, sweet, affectionate personality. I hope you never outgrow your cuddliness! I love loving you so much!

Happy 17-Months, Quinn Redding!
I love you so very much!
Love,
Mommy

Swinging at the park a couple days ago - love this face!