Memorizing

Dear Banner,
Today was a day I wanted to memorize every moment. We had such a great day today! You woke up at 7:20 yelling, "Amber! Amber!" which cracked me up, we shared a bowl of cereal while watching Yo Gabba Gabba, you dropped your milk cup and the sippy cup sprayed a couple drops out and your said, "Oh no! Clean it," and then proceeded to grab a Kleenex to wipe it up, we got dressed and headed to the Children's Aquarium, you listened really well and we were able to explore the aquarium without a stroller, without needing a reminder you said, "Thank you!" when I handed you your snack, you sang along to several songs on the drive home, you ate a fabulous lunch, you took a great nap, we had loads of fun in the backyard playing with water, chalk, and bubbles, you played independently with your trains, cars, and trucks while I made dinner, you sat nicely at dinner and ate a good meal, and you played well with Daddy while I cleaned up. But, none of that is what made it a great day. It was honestly just all those moments in between - your smile, your eyes lighting up at something new, your laughter, your silliness, your much improved listening skills and willingness to follow directions (which can be rare these days), your memory, your soft, tender skin, your inquiry of so many things ("What's that?"), your insight, your amazement of something so trivial ("That's so cool!"), your spontaneous show of affection (a lean in for a kiss or an "I love you, Mommy!"). I don't know how many times I just stopped whatever I was doing today to say, "I love you so much!" but I'm sure it wasn't near as many times as I was thinking it!

I just wanted to take this moment, the night before you turn 25-months-old, to say how in love with you I am - how in awe of you I am. I have a great memory, but today, I worry that maybe I won't capture it all, that my memory will fade or fail me, that I won't remember exactly what it feels like to hold your hand in mine or the sound of your giggle. I wish I could bottle it up and open it years from now to remember exactly what you sound like, feel like, smell like, look like.

I read someone's Facebook post the other day about how she could just eat her kid because he was so stinkin' cute. I understand what she's saying, but I've never wanted to "eat" you! I want to bottle you! I want to memorize everything! So, tonight, even though I did my very best all day to capture your every face, your every word, your every smile and laugh and gesture and . . . . everything.... I just worry it will slip away from me too fast.

Sweet boy, Mommy loves you more than you could ever know, more than I could ever explain. You make me so proud on a daily basis. In the past couple of months, you have matured into such a sweet little boy - not that you weren't already! But, you impress me so much with your kindness to your friends and family, your sponge-like brain, your use of manners, your ability to solve problems. I simply can't get enough of you, and I am so grateful for this time we have together! Thank you for this amazing day. Thank you for loving me and letting me love you. Thank you for trying your best to not grow up too fast. Thank you for letting me look at you, hold your hand, smell your hair, tickle your tummy, and hug you over and over again while I'm memorizing these every moments.

I love you, Angel!
Love,
Mommy