What HAS Changed?

This afternoon I went to a staff development and saw some of my counselor friends. Because we only see each other once a month at meetings, I suppose my marriage is still pretty fresh on their minds. I had emailed them a whole bunch of pictures from the wedding, so they're always interested in how we are doing. . . which I appreciate. So, it's because of these inquiries, that I wanted to blog about this question again.

After 4 months, Sam and I have come up with the answer to the "How's married life?" question, and that is: "Better than engaged life!" It's a good, solid response. And, it's so darn true! It's so much better: no planning of the wedding, no worrying about the guest list, no running this way and that to find the right dress or wine cup or flowers, no scheduled meetings with any vendor to only annoy us with a "plus, plus!" It's been great! So, it really is better than engaged life. But, what HAS changed?

Well, for one thing, we're definitely more emotionally connected/solidified. We both agreed that ever since the wedding, there's more of a family feel to our home and the way we think about each other. There was always a desire to be with each other, connect with each other, etc., but something switched "ON" when we became a married couple. We did not become the same person or become "one," but we definitely turned a corner that makes us more tied together, more in tune.

The biggest change, though, is the way we bank. We now have a joint account, and each of us has a separate account. The joint account has been a challenge to learn how to manage. For starters, I'm the only one that seems to check it online. Sam knows that, so he rarely pays any attention to spending. I have to remind him of how much is in the bank. I'm not used to having to plan my spending with another person. We did not bank like this until we got married, so it's been an adjustment. After talking to some girlfriends about this, we agreed as long as one person is watching the accounts, it's okay. We also agreed it's pretty typical for one person to be more cautious/observant than the other. Luckily, neither of us is a controlling person, so I'm not keeping tabs on his spending (although, I can tell what he had for lunch all week if he continues to go out for lunches rather than taking food we just bought from the grocery store - which kinda annoys me, but maybe I'm just more jealous that he gets a lunch break and I get about 25 minutes in the teachers' lounge!).

If you married, what has changed for you and your spouse? I'm just curious what other people would say. It's a good conversation-starter.