Hardest Job on Earth

Oprah used to say on her show that parenting was the hardest job on Earth. I still don't know how she knew this without being a parent, but she was so perfectly right! Now, I haven't had that many jobs before, and I don't know every job there is out there, but this parenting thing has to be the hardest one  for several reasons which I'll get into in a minute. The only jobs I've ever had in the past (and present) center around children, child development, and education. I've worked with kids of all ages - infants to teens - and I thought I knew a whole lot about them. Oh yeah, and I was one once - one with a really good memory, too. I'm not saying I thought I knew everything there was to know about children, but I woulds say I had my fair share of knowledge and skills when it came to entertaining, watching, nurturing, caring for, and teaching children. So, what makes this parenting thing so hard?

Well, no one really puts it in this perspective when you're pregnant, but you're pretty much applying for  and accepting an offer for a job, a career, that you can never quit. It's a job that offers no raises or promotions, and it doesn't even come with bathroom breaks! There are no nights or days off, there are no substitutes, there are no sick days or vacation times. Furthermore, there is no training before accepting the job. You just get hired and thrown into a whole world of "I have no idea what I'm doing!" You get the opportunity of a lifetime without any experience, but you are the expert on this child (or these children, if you have more than one). Since every kid is different, you don't get to look up the answers on the Internet or in a parenting book, and no one else will have the answers for you. What worked once may never work again. What worked with one child may not work with your next. It's a job full of questions, trial and error, and frustrations. Gwen Stefani, in this month's Parenting magazine, was asked what job would best prepare a person for being a parent. Her response, "Nothing could ever prepare you." They also asked what's the craziest thing she's done while sleep deprived. Her response: "Everything I've done for the past five years, I've done while sleep-deprived." Love it - her pure, honest, raw responses just make me glad I'm not the only one feeling so overworked, overtired, and unprepared for what this new job entails.

It's the most important job anyone could ever do - you're caring for and raising a human being to (hopefully) be a decent citizen. It's the most exhausting thing because you're never really off-duty. The mind will continue to worry, to fear, to be concerned, to question. You hope you're doing the right thing, and often times, the result of your decisions won't be known for quite a while. Many times, the gratification of a "job well done" will be very delayed. There's no boss telling you you're doing a great job or helping you with your weaknesses/challenges.  The only co-worker you have, if you are lucky enough to have one, is the other parent who is just as clueless as you are.

I never really understood what Oprah meant; how could I? My own mother told me all of these things before I had Banner, but it's something you have to experience for yourself before truly grasping the difficulty and appreciating the challenge. This job comes with its intense demands and overwhelming struggles, and you get no monetary compensation - in fact, you pay quite a bit of dough to have this job - to pay hospital bills, medical bills, put your child through college, take care of his teeth, clothe and feed him, keep his clothes clean, entertain him, enroll him in lessons of a variety of things, and so on. But, the compensation is beyond any other job, too. The smiles, the giggles, the hugs, the longing looks of love, and the cry that subsides when only you hold him - those are the rewards, the job perks, that no other job could provide. It's a daunting thought to accept a job that you can never get out of, that you can never get a break from, that you will still have 30 years from now... but I wouldn't trade it for anything! This job makes me appreciate my mom in a whole new way - and I hope one day Banner will get to be a parent and realize all the challenges I once went through raising him. I also hope he'll understand how much he's loved and how I wouldn't trade it in for anything. I hope he'll one day reap the benefits, the delayed gratification, and the love and pure joy of the hardest job on Earth.