Journey to the Knot: March 2023

Dear Knox,

You are now 7 years old! You have been for two weeks, but I have been slow to get to this letter. I wanted to wait until after your birthday party and your well-check with Dr. B before I wrote your letter, but even a week after all that, it's just been a really busy time! I still can't believe we met 7 years ago. It's getting closer to a decade, and you are not a baby in the least bit. I mourned you leaving 6 behind, because in my mind, 6 is still so little. Seven feels big! I have to remind myself that, even though you're MY baby, you are not A baby. It's so strange this whole motherhood thing. With Banner, I always feel like he act older than he does because as he reaches a new age, it seems so old. With you, though, I always feel like you can't possibly know how to do things or do things because you're so little or young. I totally understand the reasons for birth order differences and why parents might treat their kids differently. It's not fair to you or to Banner that I feel that way, and I know that. But, it's my perspective, and I'm working on it. (And that poor mid-kid who gets treated both old and young... sweet Quinn. It's never fair for anyone I guess.)

So, here's a little bit about you at 7-years-old:

We just started pragmatic language therapy with Ms. Dinah because you told me you feel awkward in new social situations. I looked into pragmatic skills because you come across as very rude in those situations, even though Dad and I have taught you these skills. We thought for a long time it was just an effect of COVID and missing out on the preschool experience and other social times, but it just wasn't improving. You have a hard time smiling, making eye contact, or speaking respectfully to others. For instance, we saw your Sunday School teacher, Ms. Sarah, at Damon's consecration this year, and you looked at your feet and said "Hi" in the most annoyed voice. When I told you to look at her and say hello, you said within her ear shot, "I don't want to. I don't want to see her. I don't like being around her." Another time, when we had guests over for Sukkot, Rabbi Kasten was introducing herself to you. She asked your name, and you said, "I'm not telling you." Later in the night, you were super loud and using inappropriate language with your brothers. It was quite embarrassing. Your behaviors can be very unexpected and inappropriate, so we had an evaluation done. While you are within normal limits, your responses and scores showed that you are on the lower side of normal in certain areas, and the therapist thought it might help to start some lessons/sessions. So, you've had about 3 lessons so far, and even knowing the vocabulary to help you has made a difference for us knowing how to better support you in new social situations or to explain why your outbursts or behaviors are inappropriate.
ADHD doesn't help your impulsive responses. You started taking medications back in March last year, and once we got those figured out, you became much calmer during the day. (Once they wear off, that's another story!)
Your teachers describe you as attentive and a good listener, so that's a great thing! Ms. Morris adored you in her class, and Miss Caccavale seems to have only great things to say about you. Miss C, in our mid-year conference last week, said you participate well, contribute well to the class, and always have what you need to do assignments. She even said you are quiet at school until about lunch or recess when your personality starts to show up and that you crack her up.
Academically, you are above the curve. You're reading at a level H right now (the goal is E mid-year), and your MAP scores are stellar. I wish you would take more time to write more legibly, but we're working on that. You're finally interested in math now, and you will go around asking us or Alexa what the answer is to a random math equation. You do enjoy reading - but not as much as your big brothers did at this age. You loved the Ready, Freddy books earlier this year, and now you're into reading about gaming - your all time favorite thing to do.
You just qualified for PACE, and you are loving it and Ms. Swearingen. We may have bribed you to actually take the tests seriously this year (compared to last year when it was reported to us that you didn't take any pride in your work, saying "I don't even want to take this test!" to Ms. S), and you didn't really want to take the tests this year, but now you are so glad you did it and got in. You love the games, puzzles, and activities you are doing with Ms. S and the other kids in PACE. Your brothers were super excited you got in, and you were so excited to tell them! Banner even said, "Welcome to the club!"
A few things that make you so super happy: screens (Switch and iPad), pretzels and muffins, sleeping in my bed, Tova, Damon, Cheeky Monkey's, Nerdvana, chocolate ice cream, Sprite, drawing, riding your scooter or bike, staying up late, Starburst...
Things that make you super unhappy: trying new foods (although very recently you've gotten better at this - trying Taco Bueno tacos, McDonald's cheeseburgers for instance), being frustrated by a video game, having to go to Sunday School (specifically after care while Banner and Quinn are at Hebrew school), when it's time to get off a screen
STATS

Height: 46.5 inches = 25th percentile
Weight: 46.6 pounds = 25th percentile
BMI: 15 = 35th percentile

We celebrated your birthday at Altitude again this year. You had so many buddies join you to celebrate at your Fortnite-themed party. You designed the cake (although the bakery got the flavor wrong - strawberry instead of chocolate). We had donuts on your actual birthday, of course. And, the night before you turned 7, we read your "I Believe," a favorite tradition I love that you and your brothers love.

Knox Morgan, you are a force to be reckoned with on all levels. When you're mad or angry, you fire off screaming and hitting and yelling and pouting. When you're excited, you're happy screams are piercing and unexpected. When you want something, you're super sweet and charming. Your emotions are loud and strong. We are working on controlling these a little better, but you are unapologetically you. You know what you want, you go for it, and you don't let anything or anyone stop you. In the past few weeks, really ever since we got home from Disney with the whole family last month, you've seemed more mature and grown up. I am enjoying watching you change into a big kid, but it's still really hard for me to believe you're as old as you are. In my mind, you're still tiny (physically, you really are.. there was a while where you weren't growing, and at a med check, Dr. B had to get onto you about eating more), and in my heart you are still my baby. But I can't wait to watch what 7 brings and what changes await as you have discovered how much you love to learn and challenge yourself, as you voice your discomfort in social situations but learn to overcome it, as you are more aware of the feelings of others, and as you try different things - like going to Greene this summer for the first time or trying new foods and activities!

I wish you the very happiest year ahead!

I love you so much, Baby Love!
Happy Birthday!
Love,

Mom